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 Post subject: Get rid of part of me
PostPosted: Fri Jun 16, 2017 1:07 am 
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Joined: Sun Dec 11, 2016 4:19 am
Posts: 91
How to get rid of part of me does not want to change??


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 16, 2017 5:44 am 
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Recovery Coach

Joined: Thu Apr 29, 2010 8:07 pm
Posts: 3944
Location: UK
Hello Lohonath
one thing that might help, I tried this myself, is to talk to your alter-egos
talk aloud
give them names
ask what they want from you and what they give in return
tell them to either prove their worth or to get out of your life forever

I laid out one conversation in my thread if you need an example

alternatively
simply choose
I tell you that change is inevitable, for better or worse ?
you get to choose but choose wisely

_________________
Remember recovery is more than abstinence
Every transition begins with an ending
Do not confuse happiness with seeking pleasure
stay healthy keep safe
Coach Kenzo


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 14, 2020 2:43 am 
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Joined: Sun Dec 11, 2016 4:19 am
Posts: 91
Quote:
I laid out one conversation in my thread if you need an example


Please share me the link


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 21, 2020 6:26 am 
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Recovery Coach

Joined: Thu Apr 29, 2010 8:07 pm
Posts: 3944
Location: UK
Hi L
ans sorry for the delay in my response
you can find an example of one of my conversations (with my essence) in my personal recovery thread p 26

I had other conversations with my alto egos
Masturbation Man, Scan man, exhibitionist, brothel creeper and their erstwhile friend and servant urge man
I gave them the opportunity to justify themselves which in reality was an impossibility and I found this exercise very useful
if it gave me nothing else it endorsed my now fully cemented belief that I could and indeed did choose

so why not try it, what do you have to lose

_________________
Remember recovery is more than abstinence
Every transition begins with an ending
Do not confuse happiness with seeking pleasure
stay healthy keep safe
Coach Kenzo


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2020 7:16 pm 
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Recovery Mentor

Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2017 11:22 am
Posts: 308
Hi L,

I think there are many ways to reflect on our readiness to change and how to shift it.

You asking shows in itself your contemplative state—a good thing as it demonstrates awareness and that there is indeed will to change that you can use to start action.

The “how” is up to you. Self talk or speaking with your ego like Kenzo mentions is a good strategy.

I have found it helpful when I examined the competing/conflicting commitments. What are my true (or perceived!) benefits from not changing? And what are they if I do change? Examining this can help you uncover the “why” it is so difficult. It’s because we perceive to need those things we get if we don’t change. But how badly do you want the things you get if you do change?

Then consider.. what small and daily behaviors am I willing to add (or remove) to initiate change? Then add them to your daily monitoring. Or whatever accountability would be helpful for you.

Just a thought. Be well!

-Anon


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