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 Post subject: std testing
PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2015 5:28 pm 
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Joined: Tue Oct 06, 2015 9:47 am
Posts: 20
When my partner first got found out to have had sex with another woman - he went and got tested and I saw all the results and they were negative. D day came 4 months after I initially thought it had been one woman only. He has been abstinent since then and for the past 7 months. I've recently been reading about partners getting tested - His results were definitely clear as I saw them in the post and texted to him. Should I still get tested myself, knowing his were ok?


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 Post subject: Re: std testing
PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2015 9:03 pm 
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Joined: Tue Apr 15, 2014 5:45 pm
Posts: 45
YES!!!!!!!

Here are two reasons:
1. It's a high level of self care and puts you in the drivers seat of your own sexual health
2. Women (from my understanding) are more susceptible to STD's because of how our anatomy is set up.

If I am ever "happily" married again I will be tested yearly regardless as to whether I believe I am in a monogamous relationship. Also, if anyone wants advice on their wedding video… from me it will be "Get tested for STD's yearly as part of your commitment to yourself and your own sexual health".


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 Post subject: Re: std testing
PostPosted: Sat Dec 12, 2015 10:11 am 
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Partner's Mentor

Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2014 1:34 pm
Posts: 657
I only see upsides to STD testing for us (and what a good idea to do it once a year if we are sexually active).

If it turns out we have nothing wrong, it will make us feel so much better.

If it turns out we do have something wrong, we can get treated.

Like liveauthentic says, it is personally empowering to take care of our health.

And, it communicates to our partners that we are committed to our personal health (role modeling healthy, adult behavior) and, frankly, puts them on some notice that they can't get away with as much BS and acting out as they used to.

dnell


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 Post subject: Re: std testing
PostPosted: Sat Dec 12, 2015 1:28 pm 
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Partner's Mentor

Joined: Mon Sep 16, 2013 3:22 pm
Posts: 124
If there were a Like button, I'd enthusiastically Like liveauthentic's and dnell's response. I love that they come from such a powerful point of view.

I would add that, first, it's an act of getting our heads out of the sand, something we as partners have had a tendency to do. It allows us to actively take responsibility for the facts as they affect us.

Second, you say that your partner is abstinent. That may be true, and hopefully it is, but in my experience here, 7 months is still relatively early in the recovery process. For your own health, I would assume that lies and acting out are still a real possibility. When it comes to your health, you do not want to be wrong there.

I'm going to take liveauthentic's advice to do STD testing annually, if I become sexually active again.

- Rising to Challenge


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 Post subject: Re: std testing
PostPosted: Mon Dec 14, 2015 11:44 am 
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Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2014 12:20 am
Posts: 131
Thankyou all for this new news!!! I'm looking into it!!

_________________
It is always OK in the end...if it's not OK, it's not the end!


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 Post subject: Re: std testing
PostPosted: Tue Dec 15, 2015 5:12 am 
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Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2015 12:43 pm
Posts: 83
Get tested and make your partner get tested.
I did, my partner threw a fit and then shoved the negative results in my face like I had done something wrong. The thing you need to concern yourself with is not their reaction, their concern etc. Getting both tested is about your safety.


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