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 Post subject: book recommendations?
PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:27 am 
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Joined: Fri Oct 07, 2016 5:17 pm
Posts: 53
Hi All,

Does anyone have any book recommendations for inspirational type stuff? Not religious but something I can read in the mornings over coffee that has a positive vibe. I wake up in the morning with such a storm inside of me and I just can't get into my yoga practice like that.

Also, any books for dealing with an emotionally unavailable man? or good reads for us partners in general? I have read Mending the Heartbreak and Facing the Heartbreak Workbook.

Thanks a million in advance.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 3:18 pm 
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Partner's Mentor

Joined: Thu Apr 18, 2013 11:38 pm
Posts: 496
This is a nice one, and bite-sized reads, Gardener_Girl:

https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Every-Moment ... 34&sr=1-12

As for books related to what we go through, I have to say: I've read so many. too many. I'll recommend- broadly- (not specific to living with a an addict) "Brave Enough" by Cheryl Strayed.

https://www.amazon.com/Brave-Enough-Che ... ave+enough


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 29, 2017 5:52 am 
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Partner's Coach (Admin)

Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2007 3:07 pm
Posts: 5199
Inspirational--the Road Less Travelled. It does have a religious slant to it, as many do. I replace "God" with "Universe", "Love", "Connectedness" (or some facsimile that god is meant to represent). I am not a religious person, I vacillate between agnosticism and atheism, but I none the less appreciate that value can be gleaned no matter the slant. ; )

Be well.

_________________
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. (Viktor E. Frankl)


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 29, 2017 11:30 am 
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Joined: Sat Jan 28, 2017 5:11 pm
Posts: 18
Gardener_Girl wrote:
Also, any books for dealing with an emotionally unavailable man? or good reads for us partners in general? I have read Mending the Heartbreak and Facing the Heartbreak Workbook.


A couple of years ago I was buying a lot of pop-psychology self-help books about addiction, affairs, betrayal and so on. I was looking for advice for how to rebuild trust, which I wanted to do because I felt that aspect was holding me back from being more present in my marriage (now I know that I didn’t feel trust, because it still wasn’t safe).

I bought “Daring to Trust” by David Richo. Rather than being a “talk myself into trusting that guy book,” it taught me ABOUT trust. The book was life changing for me. Rather than a self-help book about convincing yourself to start trusting again, it’s a thorough and astoundingly insightful guide to understanding why people lie, cheat, live double lives- and most importantly- how to recognize those people and NOT trust them, because trust is not the same as support, or understanding, or “loving kindness” as the book would say.

“When there has been a breakdown of trust, the record [of his trustworthiness] no longer stands. If our partner wants to save the relationship and is willing to give up the infidelity to work on restoration of the commitment, rebuilding trust is risky because now all we have to go on is a promise, not a record. And that promise is from someone who just betrayed us. We are entering an in-between space in which all we can do is risk trusting until a new record of trustworthiness is established. It is up to us to decide whether salvaging the relationship is worth taking that chance.”

“Trust is our best path, but discernment in how we place our trust is crucial. All of us have been lied to, deceived, or let down in some way. Yet we can remain heart-centered while proceeding with caution, and we can develop greater resilience in the face of life’s inevitable rejections and disappointments.” David Richo

I would highly recommend this book to addicts, as well, as it really goes deeply into why people lead double lives, what the impact of a person’s childhood is, etc.

This book is based on a mindfulness approach, not religious. It's not a quick read, but well worth the effort.


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 29, 2017 1:32 pm 
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Joined: Tue Apr 12, 2016 3:22 am
Posts: 108
I am into watching youtube, there are so many inspiring videos, blogs and different therapists on there, plus some lovely self hypnosis,mediation videos, I find these really have helped in my regaining self worth and learning self love and about Sa,narcs etc..i found reading became hard as I would put the book down ,with the videos I can take time out and relax while watching.


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