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PostPosted: Sun Jan 12, 2014 10:09 am 
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Joined: Tue Jan 07, 2014 2:57 am
Posts: 3
Thank God for RN! Here we are again - 5 years down the line, now married and creating a home and life together. It's not always been easy, and C's addiction has left some nasty scars and long shadows. Still - I thought we were doing pretty well and all this *stuff* was in the past. Well, it appears not.

I was gutted to discover what had been going on, but grateful, in a way, that I did before things got any worse. Over the last week I've been through the whole roller coaster of emotions, and I don't want to regurgitate them all here. I want to try to be hopeful, to trust there is a way through and a way forward, and that we will beat this thing. C seems committed to giving this his all - and right now RN is something positive for me to hold onto in the midst of it all. I plan to use the healing thread to note key points that resonate with me and to be honest about my experiences of the exercises...so here goes - lesson one.

There will be times I doubt that we can get through this together. There will be times when I doubt C will ever be free. Right now that's ok. I just need to focus on the fact we are committed to trying.

I recognise that addiction is not the root problem, and that beating that is not the complete cure. There is underlying stuff which hasn't been sorted which needs to be - otherwise I don't think we would have ended up here again. There is stuff we both need to address - individually and together - because if it's not this, it will be something else that reveals the cracks.

I can look beyond the addiction and see C - most of the time! - and that gives me hope we will find each other again. I trust that God will take our broken pieces and, through this work, put them back together to create something even more beautiful than before.

I did not choose to be in this situation; I have not prepared myself to be in this situation; and so, I will give myself time to examine my life - past, present and future - and make the decisions that are in line with the things I value.

I will post my thoughts on the first exercise after C.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 15, 2014 3:46 am 
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Joined: Tue Jan 07, 2014 2:57 am
Posts: 3
Unfortunately I found out things are worse than I first thought. I think we need to focus on our individual healing first so will be putting this thread on hold and moving to the partners workshop instead. Thanks


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 10:30 am 
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Partner's Coach (Admin)

Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2007 3:07 pm
Posts: 5200
Personally, I believe that the individual workshops are a necessary foundation for couple's healing. Regardless, when you get to stage two of the couple's, you are directed to complete the individual workshops before proceeding. Best to both of you in your respective processes.

_________________
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. (Viktor E. Frankl)


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