Recovery Nation

Personal Development Forum
It is currently Wed Aug 21, 2019 7:20 am

All times are UTC - 5 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 5 posts ] 
Author Message
PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2014 9:53 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jul 22, 2014 1:33 am
Posts: 8
Lesson 1

Done


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2014 10:08 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2014 2:33 pm
Posts: 50
lesson 2

He warmed up some leftovers and fed them to me but didn't do anything else. I was very hurt and disappointed that he did not make a plan or put any thought into the lesson. It made me feel rejected. I made him redo the lesson weeks later and he bathed me and combed my hair. It was nice but still not the same as if he had actually made a plan and and put some thought into it. Also I had to tell him to redo the lesson and that took alot away from the experience. I wish I could get a little more compassion.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2014 11:14 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2014 2:33 pm
Posts: 50
Lesson 3

almost all my values have been compromised so I see future conflict with all of them. I tried to narrow down my values into what actions are the most destructive to my emotional stability and to our relationship.

Sexual Fidelity This means physical, emotional, and mental fidelity. Physical- using your body in a sexual act that does not involve me. Emotional- having intimate sexual feelings for another. Mental- viewing or imagining another person in a sexualy stimulating way.

Consequences
One of the following will occur depending on the severity of the act
-sleep in separate beds until I can feel comfortable again.
-He will stay at his parents until I am comfortable with him in the house again.
-End of the relationship.

Pornography Any material(picture or video) that can be used for sexual stimulation. This includes evidence that pornography has recently been deleted/destroyed. Pornography found anywhere in the home, garage or car.

Consequences
If he is found in possession of pornography he will move back to his parents until I am confident that he is advancing in recovery.

Hidden Activities Any item or activity that would hurt me, violate boundaries, or cause a disagreement, that he is keeping hidden.

Consequences
If the hidden activity is not disclosed within a 24hr period, it will result it the end of the relationship. He is responsible for ensuring that all mistakes or bad choices can be dealt with in an appropriate time frame as a couple.

Lying/omitting the truth Any phrase that is not 100% true is a lie. Promises that are made without the full intention of being fulfilled are also lies. Leaving out important facts to avoid conflict are also lies.

Consequences
-Sleep in separate beds until amends are made
-Move back to his parents until amends are made
-End of the relationship

Recovery Work A minimum of one recovery action needs to be done every week.

Consequences
-If one recovery action isnt completed each week then he will have to do two extra recovery actions the following week.
-If more than two weeks go by without a completed recovery action then he will be asked to leave.

Illegal activity Any illegal act committed because of his addiction problems.

Consequences
I will report him to the police.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 2:00 am 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jul 22, 2014 1:33 am
Posts: 8
Lesson 3
Sexual Fidelity
- Physically using your body in a sexual act that not includes myself.
- Emotionally having Sexual feelings for another.
- mentally viewing another person in a sexually stimulating way
Consequences
- Sleeping tin separate beds
- Living Away From Home
- Termination of relationship

Loyalty
- Commitment and Support
Consequences
- Living away form home
- Termination of relationship

Hobbies
- Pursuing Interests
Consequences
- Draw up a Schedule to balance time spent.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun Oct 26, 2014 11:09 am 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2014 2:33 pm
Posts: 50
Lesson 6

I am the only one who did this exercise. I'm not sure how many he found because he became defensive and shut down when I asked. By the end of the week my self esteam was pretty damaged. Not finding a single note that might show that I'm appreciated or loved made me feel even more rejected and used. It definitely shows that I am not a priority and that my feelings are not considered. Huge blow!


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 5 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 5 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group