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 Post subject: Need some help/direction
PostPosted: Sat Jan 16, 2021 12:32 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jul 09, 2019 6:12 pm
Posts: 34
I thought/felt I was at a relatively good mind set at last post/coach conversation. I had progressed well in our church disciple group for about 8 months and eventually led a group myself. Helped start a men’s ministry/podcast. I had learned that Christ loved me despite my porn addiction or any other flaws. It felt great not to live each day with the bombardment of constant images or fantasies. Over the past 3-4 months (approximately) I started to notice a increase of subtle stressors accumulate: job security during the pandemic, politics, and increase of responsibilities at church. The associate/college pastor and disciple pastor left the church, somewhat partially dividing the church. My wife and I along with another couple have been helping out with the college group and Also helping each gender group separately on different days. Additionally, I continued to teach Sunday school with my wife. So until the recent holidays I was involved with the church in some aspect 5 out of 7 days. Initially it was good, I felt good pouring into and helping others. But I think the pressure of it all, coupled with not staying active with RN took its toll on me and the healthy lifestyle changes I once had slowly eroded. I would start watching tv more, especially negative politics, and spend increasing amounts of time listening to podcasts or pulling up current political disputes. I would check in on Facebook more often and start to scroll through friends/request and looking for photos that were more increasingly suggestive. I would catch myself, regroup, tell my wife and move on. Recently as this would wax and wane it eventually led to looking at funny memes and explicit funny memes/groups on FB that had porn. Which is where I’m at now, I haven’t looked at it for a couple of days but my wife did find out in which I struggled with honesty to tell the truth.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 17, 2021 2:52 am 
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Recovery Mentor

Joined: Wed Nov 14, 2018 2:39 am
Posts: 264
Hi Covenant,

Quote:
I was involved with the church in some aspect 5 out of 7 days.

First of all it sounds like you may have got so involved with the church that it was swapping one addiction for another?
The key to stopping acting out is to have strong values and boundaries, so maybe you should review yours and check if they are strong enough to keep you sober?
I see that the regularity of posting on your RN thread is erratic and that will not help.
The RN lessons are a complete guide to recovery, you cannot hope to succeed without finishing the whole course.

I hope that helps?

_________________
“Change your thoughts, change your life.” ~Lao Tzu
Regards
T


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 17, 2021 7:43 am 
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Recovery Coach

Joined: Thu Apr 29, 2010 8:07 pm
Posts: 4026
Location: UK
Hi C

first a point of protocol
questions and or please for help / advice should be posted on the community thread
there they are so much more liokely to be responded to
however no harm done

I agree with T
perhaps you should be getting back on the horse?
I belive it is a year since you last posted into your own recovery thread
recovery demands consitency and commitment, without these failure is almost certain

so
why not jump back into the lessons?
there is so much in there for your benefit

completion of this workshop does not give guarantees because recovery vs addiction is a choice, but the wisdom of THE Coach Bless his soul, does give us the tools to change

good luck, you choose

_________________
Remember recovery is more than abstinence
Every transition begins with an ending
Do not confuse happiness with seeking pleasure
stay healthy keep safe
Coach Kenzo


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2021 9:11 am 
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Joined: Tue Jul 09, 2019 6:12 pm
Posts: 34
I will get back on the horse. Thank you both for the advice.


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