|lesson 1 ( why permanent change?)
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|Author:||cedieke [ Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:33 pm ]|
|Post subject:||lesson 1 ( why permanent change?)|
For a couple of years now, I'm more surviving than really living. I might have some mental issues that make living a little more difficult, but I'm also escaping life as it presents to me, or I'm hiding for it or I take no initiative to live life at its fullest. I did enjoy life and regard it as an adventure during some periods in my past when I was way younger. I also regularly wished life had been different, or that I had made better choices or ... (a bunch of excuses really).
This can not go on, my addiction results in a lot of waste of time. And I feel bad about it ( the waste of time), and it results sometimes in financial hardship because I don't have the energy to do what needs to be done. My addiction takes away my motivation and initiative to do something else, something more productive. Something I can be proud of. I'm at a place where either I change dramatically (with little steps? day bey day) or live becomes a complete missed/wasted exercise.
My addiction does not bring me forward, it prohibits a lot of desired behaviors.
I wan to change my life because I want a more positive perspective, such as:
- more friends, company, partner. This will involve getting out
- make money, real money. This will involve time and dedication, and sleep.
- work on my projects/goals, really work on them beyond the planning stage
- clean-up and organize my life minimally an keep it that way
- commit to my goals and my life
- be happier
- be busy like I was years ago, with a purpose (having a purpose would be nice)
- getting rid of laziness, boredom, etc.
- feeling the : today was a good day, I did a lot of work
- positively contribute to society and community and organisations
- feel good about myself, emotional physical financial etc.
- be positive and proud about myself, for what I am and what I do
- being less stressed and being able to relax naturally
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