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PostPosted: Thu Dec 19, 2019 2:34 am 
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Joined: Sat Nov 02, 2019 8:58 am
Posts: 18
Went to a Thai massage and then masturbated 2 nights ago. I felt uncomfortable and awkward at the work's Christmas lunch. People were not involving me in their conversations and I felt I had nothing to add to their's. This played into my negative narritive in my head that I am odd and different from other people. I had choices. I wrestled with the thoughts about keeping to my values against lifting my depressed and sad mood through masturbation. Masturbation felt safer but was the most expensive option!


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 19, 2019 6:20 am 
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Recovery Coach

Joined: Thu Apr 29, 2010 8:07 pm
Posts: 3893
Location: UK
Hi
Quote:
Masturbation felt safer


safer or easier??????????????? :pe:

Quote:
Reduce the Role of Playing the Victim -

but you went to a massage parlour because
Quote:
I felt uncomfortable and awkward at the work's Christmas lunch


Sorry but this appears to be straight from the book of addicts excuses

I ask that you re evaluate where you are and where you really want to be
If recovery is to happen then someone needs to make it happen and that someone is you
is it easy? is it f***

but can it be done, the only way to answer that is to say case by case
you have the choice, recover or dont

but in making that decision realise that you are responsible and accountable for that outcome

choose wisely and remember that if you do choose recovery then this RN community is there for you

PS a credit to you for your honesty, that is a positive embrace it

_________________
Remember recovery is more than abstinence
Every transition begins with an ending
Do not confuse happiness with seeking pleasure
stay healthy keep safe
Coach Kenzo


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 22, 2019 5:18 pm 
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Joined: Sat Nov 02, 2019 8:58 am
Posts: 18
Thank you Kenzo for the update.

I am making execuses. My low moods and anxiety are looking for justification through perceived negative actions of others and then I am looking for an exit through acting out. I need to take responsibility for my emotions and actions going forward.


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 22, 2019 5:45 pm 
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Joined: Sat Nov 02, 2019 8:58 am
Posts: 18
13) Strengthen my Sexual Relationship with my Wife

i) Talk to my wife about her physical needs and wants.
ii) Look to engage and instigate more physical intimacy - cuddling, kissing and holding hands.
iii) Move past the shame to talk to my wife about my physical intimacy needs.

15) Commit to Recovery

i) Go to recovery meetings on regular basis.
ii) Talk to Members and Sponsor when feeling the urge to act out or fantasing.
iii) Be more in my sharing with Members and Sponsor.
iv) Work recovery and not to be lazy.


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 27, 2019 12:08 pm 
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System Technician

Joined: Tue Sep 20, 2011 1:25 pm
Posts: 88
Hi Augustus, looks like you're going great guns with the lessons.

I see you've got the hang of keeping your posts in the same thread by replying. I've now merged your two earliest posts into this one and given the whole thing an appropriate title.

Best Wishes & Good Luck,
SysTech


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 14, 2020 1:24 am 
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Joined: Sat Nov 02, 2019 8:58 am
Posts: 18
Thank you SysTech team.


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