Recovery Nation

Personal Development Forum
It is currently Sat Jul 21, 2018 4:32 pm

All times are UTC - 5 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 16 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 4:28 pm 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 3:58 am
Posts: 665
Hi everyone,

I recently saw a great metaphor by one of the people working on the Recovery Side, onTheRoad, for the amount of anxiety created by trying not to participate in one of his compulsive rituals. I responded and altered the metaphor a bit, and I think it came out as a great way to think about why focusing on avoiding your compulsive behaviours will only take you so far in recovery. He allowed me to share it here graciously, and I hope that my metaphor (hopefully not too convoluted :ex: ) will be helpful to some. I can't stress enough that the focus of your recovery CAN'T be on avoiding your behaviours.

This is what he said:

onTheRoad wrote:
The anxiety of not acting out is kinda hard to express. It was like just like you are 15 and your dad just got a brand new ferrari in the garage with a full tank of gas and he's just out of town and left the keys at home. You always wanted a sports car. Your dad won't let you drive, he won't even let you look at it . But the car is right there. You know you weren't supposed to take it. You might brake it, you might get caught, you might get stopped by the police, you might hit someone. But he's not home, how will he find out and you will just take a look at maybe sit in a little, it's gonna be awsome. One look won't hurt. When you see it you know you have to see it form the inside too and of course sit in it. Now your sitting in it and thinking I wonder how the engine sounds, why wouldn't I fire it for a second, just a second. Then you fire it and may stop it in a second. But you loved how it sounds, you want to hear it some more, you want to give it some gas. Of course you can't think of anything else but firing it again. So you fire it and give it some gas, now you start thinking I wonder how it would be to drive it. Maybe I could move it just a little on the drive way. You move it and you love it, now you think, What if I just take it one spin around the block? What can happen? I'll go slow and be really careful. Of course you take it around the block, but now you are so hyped you just need to take it on the motorway and really see what this baby can do. Pretty soon you're doing 200 on the motorway, while the police are chasing you and you end up hitting a bunch of pedestrians. Something like that.


My response:

forwardthinker wrote:

You will make great progress in your recovery when you see NOT acting out with happiness and pride, rather than with anxiety and a feeling like you're missing out on something. If you are still feeling anxiety by not acting out, this is because it is still a behaviour that you are avoiding...even though you secretly want to do it. Or, you actually don't want to do it, so you focus on not doing it...which ironically causes you to focus on it. This is still based in avoidance, rather than behaving in a way that is consistent with your life vision and values. Stop thinking about porn and just focus on how you want to live your life. When you make this switch, you will not see "not acting out" as something that creates anxiety, but rather a source of pride, a knowledge that you're acting in the best interest of your ongoing stability and the life you want to build for yourself.

To use your car analogy (and alter it slightly), porn is like a car that looks like a Ferrari from the outside...but when you go and sit in it, turn it on, and rev it...the engine starts smoking, the wheels fall off, and the gas tank explodes. After making it out alive, you feel ashamed of yourself, guilty for what you've done...knowing that it wasn't in your best interest. But you go back to staring at the Ferrari from a distance...knowing that inside, it's actually a Pinto that will explode...but hey, it looks good from a distance, doesn't it? And if you FORCE yourself not to stare at it, you still constantly think about just how great it might look. Eventually, the anxiety is too much, and you end up going and trying to start it again...and keep getting burned.

Next to that Ferrari in the same garage is a Lexus that you have been building from scratch (in this metaphor, your life vision and values :ex: ). The engine isn't quite put together yet, there's some panelling missing, and the interior is still a work in progress ...but you're slowly putting it together from the core (and working on doing it right), even though the Ferrari is sitting right next to it. Avoiding looking at the Ferrari has taken your attention away from actually putting together the Lexus. But you know that if you just focus on putting the Lexus together, you'll end up with a solid car that actually runs smoothly and will take you where you need to go. Instead of trying to NOT look at the Ferrari, you focus on working on the Lexus...and soon, you're adding more and more parts, and it's looking better and better every day. Eventually, you've finished the car, get in and drive away...and you don't even want to look at the Ferrari anymore, because you know that your Lexus is a whole car, and not empty and superficial. At this point, you'd rather drive the Lexus (and pay attention to the Lexus) instead of look at the Ferrari.

To leave the metaphor, once you start to get glimpses of a healthy life, you will look back at porn and realize how empty it really is. You will see its effect on your life...and compare it to the healthy fulfillment you get from your values...and there will be no contest as to what you choose. You will no longer be filled with fear and anxiety...because you will no longer want it as part of your reality. But again, this can't be built by focusing on avoiding the problem. It must be built by working on strengthening your values, and behaving and thinking in the way you want to.


EDIT: After Shaw's post below, I changed the title to broaden this thread. Feel free to add any metaphors that you think help enlighten different difficult-to-understand parts of recovery (for either recovering addicts or partners!)

FT

_________________
"It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell." - Buddha


Last edited by forwardthinker on Tue Aug 02, 2011 10:52 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 4:57 pm 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Tue Jan 19, 2010 8:54 am
Posts: 1377
Hi Ft

I like this - I thought a while back of putting up a thread about metaphors that help us visualise recovery.

To use your moto-vehicle metaphor. For me, using pornography/sex is like taking a scenic route. It looks nice. It seems to get from a to z. Only the journey winds on and on, wearing out your car, pissing off everyone in your life, exhausting all the energies and goodness you possess.

Recovery, as a journey, looks less interesting - it seems at times actually impossible. But once you set out along it, pay attention to the landmarks, you realise it is the shortest distance between two points. You arrive refreshed, focused. You have had some bumps along the way - sure. but you have kept going and arrived with out distraction.

When I visualise this journey, its darker passages are lit by values, its sharper turns protected by boundaries. When a mist descends, we have a plan - or map - to guide us forward.

I think this works. Just lept to mind.

Shaw


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Aug 03, 2011 8:37 am 
Offline
General Coach (Admin)

Joined: Fri Oct 03, 2008 1:49 pm
Posts: 3956
Took this off for both sides and will post something similar but more specific to partners on their board.

Thanks FT!!


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Aug 03, 2011 11:00 am 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Tue Jan 19, 2010 8:54 am
Posts: 1377
Hi FT

Thanks for the thread. My wife loved the car metaphor. Me too!

I was thinking about those puzzle game books I had as a kid - with crosswords, and find the word games. That sort of thing.

One of the puzzles had a set of words down one side of the page - and on the other a picture or a connected word. The idea was to link the right word to the right pictures.

In a way, I think sex addiction and recovery can be imagined like this. In addiction - we connect an emotion to the wrong value. We feel anxious - rather than face that anxiety - we connect it to porn, sex, procrastination, escapism, fantasy. It is absurd, destructive and illogical!!!!!

Recovery asks us to connect that feeling to the right values. WE feel anxious - what do our values suggest we do about it?

Here's an example from this week. I had an article to write. Big piece. Short time. I felt pressure. I sat down on the first day. Turned on the computer. Always a triggering moment. I could feel the anxiety sharpen, and then increase as my computer takes an age to start.

I was doing little to counter my rising anxiety. I began to perceive it - dimly - as overwhelming. I slowly realised a classic response would be to get up and walk away - have coffee - waste more time - feel more pressure build, perceive my emotions as being overwhelming, intense and incapable of control. This would be the classic trigger to act out - or escape. My task would still be there - just as large - but I would have less time - and I would be emotionally unstable.

I just about got my act together. I walked away from the screen - which slightly cleared my head. I recognised what was happening - love that word recognise. I realised my heart was racing. I drank some water. Splashed some more on my face. Told myself where I was - what I needed to do. Reminded myself that I need to calm down - just start work - get my brain going positively.

I was definitely a little unstable, but I had a context for it. I had a plan. Not worry whether I was writing well or not - just write, and address the problem directly.

The break helped - the water helped. Got me in touch with the world outside my head. I connected to the world physically - ahwich helped me connect to my values. I am still shaky on this - but I got clear-headed enough to calm down.

It is making this connection - as opposed to connecting my emotions to sex - that made me think of that puzzle book. That sense of drawing a line with action between a feeling and a clear plan. The line might be a little shaky, but it grounds you.

Thanks FT for the thread. I find these images really help me get clear when I feel confused. Which is most of the time.

Shaw


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:54 am 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Tue Jan 19, 2010 8:54 am
Posts: 1377
A couple that have come to mind.

Lying. Often I do this compulsively - even when I dont need to lie, I find myself automatically bending the truth, and then desperately trying to keep up with my own inventions.

I compared it to diving off the high board at a swimming pool, then wishing I hadnt. I twist this way and that, panic, try and keep steady, but I am tumbling faster and faster - until I belly flop painfully into the water.

Forwardthinker's post about active values made me think of Coach Jon's meptaphor in the lesson on Values:

Quote:
What an engine is to your car, values are to your life. Can a person still drive a car without an engine? Yes, but not efficiently. The engine performs a particular role for that car (to generate energy), and unless that role is fulfilled by some other means, the car will not run. What other options are available to generate this motion? The use of a tow truck, or the assurance that all of the trips made in that car will be downhill. Yes, that is sarcasm. But nonetheless, the car can still function as a mode of transportation--albeit in a much less efficient manner. Can a person live without values? Yes, but not efficiently. Values perform a particular role in life (to generate energy), and unless that role is fulfilled by some other means, that life will not run. What options are available in a life not stimulated by one's values? Well, addiction for one.


Perhaps FT's post about intellectualising and action might be likened to a boat. The engine is the action - driving you forward. The thought process is like the rudder, guiding you along. Not sure if this works exactly. but i quite like it.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Sep 22, 2011 6:20 pm 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 3:58 am
Posts: 665
This is an analogy I wrote on someone's thread here the other day that I was pretty happy with.

Where you are at when you start to recover from addiction....is like being stuck in a cave by yourself on an island, with a rowboat and a map to the mainland. Is staying in the cave safer and easier? Sure, at least in the short term...you don't need to worry about rain, it's warmer, you don't have to do any work other than crack coconuts for food...but you run the risk of being lonely, miserable, and running out of the energy needed to gather coconuts over time. So you get in the rowboat. RN is the map to the mainland. Can you see the mainland from where you are now? No. Does having the map guarantee that you'll make it to the mainland? No. Does the map teach you how to row, give you the will to do so, or tell you what you will personally face on your journey (ie. rain, lack of food, tidal waves, sea monsters)? No.

But if you believe that your life will truly be better if you make it to the mainland, and you have the will to get there yourself...you cast off, with the uncertainty of knowing that you may not make it and that there are certainly rough waters ahead, but that you'd prefer that to staying in the cave for the rest of your life. But, you can never make it to the mainland if you keep turning around when the waves get too turbulent (ie. hanging onto your addiction). Once you've left the island for good...in order to make it to the mainland, there can be no turning back, no matter what you face.

_________________
"It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell." - Buddha


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2016 10:46 am 
Offline
Recovery Coach

Joined: Fri Nov 25, 2011 2:49 pm
Posts: 1626
Bump

_________________
"If you cannot find the truth right where you are, where do you expect to find it?" - Dogen

"Be a lamp unto yourself." - Buddha

"The obstacle is the path."


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sat Sep 17, 2016 7:23 am 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Tue Jan 19, 2010 8:54 am
Posts: 1377
One image that has always helped me is that Values are like a life raft - or possibly a lighthouse - I can't decide which!!!!!

When we feel emotional turmoil, when an urge threatens to overwhelm us, our values are guide us to shore and to the peace we need to calm down, and see clearly.

Especially at the start of recovery, it might help to have some useful phrases written down and near your computer. This rams home the reality of what you are doing. If you are feeling an urge to look for porn, then the words help break down the illusion. And if you do relapse, it helps you face what you have done honestly.

Great thread. Sometimes recovery can feel abstract. I always found thinking of an idea in visual terms helped make it more real.

Shaw


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sat Oct 08, 2016 12:15 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Sep 15, 2015 9:52 am
Posts: 98
Location: Ger
Just came up with a short metaphor/modell that helped me to gain focus on how to priorize my values and how to feel stability. While I write this out it seems kind of dumb, because it's super simple and we learn this in the first stage of the workshop but the way I applied it was really helpful to me, so I hope it will help you too.

Living a healthy life, means living and managing from top to bottom.
Living an unhealthy life, means living and managing from bottom to top.

So what do I mean with it? Take your life's philosophy. It's the top layer. It's the point where you come back to, to balance your life and seek for guidance. It's your core. From there on you create the important areas of your life. Imagine a grid, that you can fill with different themes that you value. Family, Relationships, Finances, Education.. you name it. Every cell of this grid should be sized the same approx, to have a balanced and stable life. To keep those themes in balance, the layer above (so the philosophy) provides you with certain values. Then, in every cell of the grid lays the "world" of each theme. It's filled with topics or stories. So for eg. the theme "Education" is filled with topics/stories about your weekly evening class, the book about physics you're reading, the certificate you want to get and so on. To manage and balance these stories/topics, the cell itself provides you with specific values. [I think this aligns pretty well with the lesson on how it's important to rebuild our sexual/romantic values isolated and specified]. And then there's the last layer, the bottom, where you're faced with the specific circumstances of that story. That's the layer, where everything you created to deal with your life cumulatively comes to work again. It's where you're present in the here and now. It's where life happens. If you move there from the top, I think that what you're experiencing is more real and based on a stable ground. So when I feel like a problem get's too big, like I suddenly feel very jealous towards a platonic friend and my thoughts start to spin out of control, it helps to first thing about how this should be priorized in regards to the other stories in that cell. So I'm asking myself, how does the cell sourrunding this topic "dictate" what's best? I check it against the other topics and see what would be appropriate. Some times this already helps, but when a certain story gets big, I tend to overblow that cell and suddenly other cells and themes of my life become smaller and smaller. That's when I take the next step and ask myself, how can I respect the content of that cell, while also not letting it blow everything out of balance? And that's where I align things along the top layer of my philosophy, where I ask - how do I want to handle all of this, in relation to each other?

Seeing life that way helps me to prioritize much better. And in my opinion it's absolutely okay to loosen up those boundaries, when you feel comfortable. Some times, when you're working on a big project, this cell might needs more place and a certain story is all you work on, in that cell, to accomplish something big. BUT it should always align with the top layer (the philosophy). You don't have to see it that "big" every time. There are things in day to day life that just happen, where you can't just sit back and say "well let's first find out where to put this". Maybe your dishwasher breaks and it's the most important thing to fix it, then there's still the top layer to seek for guidance, the initial set of values. So something like that won't shake you up that much, in an ideal case.

So the other way around, bottom to top in an unhealthy life, kind of goes like that:
Let's pretend there barely even exists something like a grid of areas in your life. Most possible, it's not that well thought out. Anyway, bottom to top. You see your whole life on that story layer. And since we're dealing with sexual/romantic addiction, it's those stories that give us the most. So instead of having the values dripple down, the unhealthy values spread up. For example you're chatting with a platonic friend. Suddenly things get more and more tense and you start to talk about suggstive topics. It pulls you in and you feel the warmth and joy of sexual fantasies. But there's still life. You have to clean up your apartment, you have to go to work. And you still do these things. But managed from the bottom. So you use the "values" that this certain story predicts. Which might be "ok, I have to get home early after work, to have more time to chat with her" and you get up early to leave work earlier. Or you postpone going to the supermarket, because she's online during a certain frame. All those unhealthy values become the guide of your life. And the value of that story is in most cases just "gain as much emotional stimulation and avoid as much emotional pain as possible". And here kicks in our knowledge about how addiction works. The story becomes boring, so you need another one. Or just enhance it. Maybe making it a ritualistic chain. But no matter what story is currently the most relevant, you're just down there managing your life from bottom to top. And funny thing is, sometimes you run out of stories, I think that's what happens when you first start recovery and you're like really deep in that hole of depression, not knowing what to do. That's where I experienced a strange feeling, I suddenly wasn't interested in a certain story, I just wanted "something". I just wanted my cell of relationships filled with some stuff to keep going.

Ok, don't know if this helps you guys or if I just casually explained addiction in different terms, but these thoughts really clicked with me, when visualizing my behavior. To end on a cheesy note, addiction really turns your life upside down.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun Oct 09, 2016 4:30 am 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Thu Oct 24, 2013 12:26 pm
Posts: 189
Hi Axel
axelswagger wrote:
So the other way around, bottom to top in an unhealthy life, kind of goes like that:
Let's pretend there barely even exists something like a grid of areas in your life. Most possible, it's not that well thought out. Anyway, bottom to top. You see your whole life on that story layer. And since we're dealing with sexual/romantic addiction, it's those stories that give us the most. So instead of having the values dripple down, the unhealthy values spread up. For example you're chatting with a platonic friend. Suddenly things get more and more tense and you start to talk about suggstive topics. It pulls you in and you feel the warmth and joy of sexual fantasies. But there's still life. You have to clean up your apartment, you have to go to work. And you still do these things. But managed from the bottom. So you use the "values" that this certain story predicts. Which might be "ok, I have to get home early after work, to have more time to chat with her" and you get up early to leave work earlier. Or you postpone going to the supermarket, because she's online during a certain frame. All those unhealthy values become the guide of your life. And the value of that story is in most cases just "gain as much emotional stimulation and avoid as much emotional pain as possible". And here kicks in our knowledge about how addiction works. The story becomes boring, so you need another one. Or just enhance it. Maybe making it a ritualistic chain. But no matter what story is currently the most relevant, you're just down there managing your life from bottom to top. And funny thing is, sometimes you run out of stories, I think that's what happens when you first start recovery and you're like really deep in that hole of depression, not knowing what to do. That's where I experienced a strange feeling, I suddenly wasn't interested in a certain story, I just wanted "something". I just wanted my cell of relationships filled with some stuff to keep going.

Ok, don't know if this helps you guys or if I just casually explained addiction in different terms, but these thoughts really clicked with me, when visualizing my behavior. To end on a cheesy note, addiction really turns your life upside down.


A very interesting perspective you have shared there and its certainly helpful as i can draw some parallels to my own "bottom up unhealthy tendencies". I can use that to find and devise practical solutions to my day to day way of life.
I have recently reconnected with someone i wanted to date some years ago. I had actually decided or maybe decided is not the right word, i just felt or thought that i should not try to have any new relations of any sort for a while at least a year or so so i can have more time to work on my issues. On the other hand this seemed like just hiding or avoiding reality, of course romantic or sexual relations can be shelved but other relations such as friendships and family can not be ignored as one still needs a supportive structure in the recovery process. After all, RN teaches us about building and maintaining healthy relationships, your "top down method" so to speak.
So the bottom line is we chat on whatsapp and this started off as once in a while then a bit more often till it became a daily thing, so the intention was top-down but eventually turned bottom up. I have some boundaries though and i have to keep redefining them, for instance, i have to keep the chats impersonal, i should be open and honest, no delusions, should not be longer than an hour at most, no suggestive sexual or romantic talk or anything that remotely resembles that. Keep it totally clean. So far things are going ok but i want to scale back as i am sacrificing study time. We live in different time zones and the time she is free is my study time so i have had to cut back on that. Chatting has always been my point of weakness and at first i avoided but realized that its not social media thats wrong but my way of managing, i have to manage my time, what i say and prioritize important things like spending time with my kids or studying. My whatsapp usage was starting to get compulsive in the sense that i would check the statuses of certain contacts to see if or when they were last online. To counter this i started to switch off the phone and not carry it around with me, if i had to have it with me, i ignore the messages till i had time to respond, but this was avoidance at most and not dealing with my issues. i am learning to separate or filter genuine needs for a human connection from false impressions of compulsive unhealthy wants. On the upside, I have also thought about some of the statuses of my contacts that i check, last seen yesterday at 16:30pm or last seen on Friday at 17:00, so i thought why cant that be me? i imagine that they have used that time to be with family or do other important stuff in their lives. I see them as balanced and living a healthy lifestyle. So I have decided.....i too should be last seen yesterday....use whatsapp as minimally as possible to wind down and catch up, manage my time profitably for time is money.
Yes these are simple steps but their impact can be huge if consistently applied.

Thanks for sharing

_________________
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism.


Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakens.


Carl Jung


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Oct 11, 2016 2:40 am 
Offline
General Mentor

Joined: Tue Oct 22, 2013 12:47 pm
Posts: 694
Great top-bottom and bottom-up analogy! It proves you are getting to a deeper understanding not just theoretical but also practical :g:
axelswagger wrote:
To end on a cheesy note, addiction really turns your life upside down.

Nicely put, indeed. However, I would change the term "addiction" to "deficient emotional management system". It is so very obvious to me how I tend to bank on the activities and experiences which would provide the most intense stimulation to the detriment of all others. Nowadays I am able to lead a balanced life, pretty peaceful and fulfilling but as soon as an opportunity comes up which triggers the romantic/sexual area with promises of life long unfulfilled desires and goals, it is becoming increasingly hard to keep the balanced outlook as most of the time and energy get sucked in and all other are reduced to absolute musts. On a more positive note, it takes quite a lot to even consider someone romantically and even in that I am able to make value based decisons in the midsts of emotional turmoil. I've noticed that even if I sometimes struggle to make the right choice short-term, I am able to make the right choice long-term as I keep my values and my vision as a guide to decision-making. Also I have dropped a lot of romantic delusions, assumptions and misunderstandings, for example, it is possible to care for someone deeply, maybe even experience feelings of "love" but know that a relationship will not work out and being able to let it go and stay true to myself. I also see a lot of progress in how I deal with things and how I constantly learn and apply all the knowledge I gained here, from all sources and life stories.
Therefore, what we call addiction is nothing more than ingrained deficient ways of getting positive stimulation in our lives. The work that we do here is essential to gaining this insight and correcting the way we perceive and connect with the things in our lives. And yes, you can call this deficient management system the bottom-up approach. I think the analogy is excellent because it really simplifies the recovery concepts and process to essential schematics. It could also provide a powerful monitoring tool in asking yourself "Am I managing more top-bottom or bottom-up these days?" Great stuff. Thanks.

_________________
"A wholehearted attention feels like the nurturing presence that I always wished I had in a parent. Now I am free to be there for myself in a way that I assumed I needed from someone else." Tara Bennett-Goleman, Emotional Alchemy


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun Mar 18, 2018 11:23 am 
Offline

Joined: Tue Sep 15, 2015 9:52 am
Posts: 98
Location: Ger
Recently I came up with a nice analogy for the process of recovery, that I wanted to share. I think the contept of recovery is a lot like learning to cook. First you start with a fixed recipe (action plans, tools, the workshop itself), that will tell you each step in order to make a meal (decisions, goals, urge control etc.). At first, you don't want to leave anything to chance - like for how long you apply heat or the amount of each ingredient. But the further you develop, the more flexible you become in working with these components. You'll start to learn how these elements affect each other, when to use ingredient x or y, what kind of side dish goes with your desired meal and so on. You've developed a bunch of skills that makes it possible to create a nice meal (or decision/emotion/stability) from scratch.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Mar 28, 2018 7:16 am 
Offline
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2017 11:22 am
Posts: 184
This resonates deeply with me and my recovery.


Chapter I

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost... I am hopeless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter II

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in this same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter III

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it there.
I still fall in... it's a habit... but,
my eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter IV

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter V

I walk down another street.

- Portia Nelson


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 16 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

All times are UTC - 5 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group