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PostPosted: Wed Dec 04, 2019 11:28 am 
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Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:42 pm
Posts: 175
LESSON 44
URGE CONTROL: MY CORE IDENTITY
A. Describe the role a healthy core identity will provide
1. I will be honest with others and myself
2. What I do on the outside is what I am on the inside
3. I will make healthy decisions on handling life's decisions
B. Describe the role that value-based experiences will play in developing my core identity
1. I will respect myself more
2. I can be myself as who I am and not what others want me to be
3. I will not be in fear of making unhealthy decisions
4. I will gain respect from others
C. Examine my current core Identity
1. I am more aware of my feelings and actions when I am around other people
2. I have developed some boundaries around my values that help me make healthy decisions
3. If I make a destructive decision I feel guilty and shame and it motivates me me not to repeat the poor decision again
4. If I am caught in making a bad decision I will evaluate where I went wrong and work at correcting
the problem


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 04, 2020 7:33 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:42 pm
Posts: 175
Lesson 45
URGE CONTROL: ISOLATING THE EMOTION
Map a compulsive Ritual
On a previous compulsive chain every morning for a couple weeks I would look out my bathroom window hoping to see a women two doors down from my home that sometimes puts on her make up in the nude with her blinds open.
- I was hoping to see her in the nude (Anticipation)
- When I looked this one morning she was putting on her make up in the nude (Excitement) (Visual)
- I started touching myself to in cress the excitement (increased excitement)
- My wife is in the attached room asleep, I was afraid she would wake up and catch me (fear)
- My wife did wake and did'n catch me but I had to stop watching the women (relived), (frustrated)
- My wife left for work and I started fantasizing (fantasizing)
- I stared masturbating slowly ( excitement) (anticipation)
- I started using lotion to increase the sensations (higher excitement)
- I had an orgasm (satisfaction) (completion)
Point of no return
- seeing the women in the nude


Last edited by Recovery on Wed Jan 08, 2020 1:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 08, 2020 1:17 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:42 pm
Posts: 175
LESSON 46
URGE CONTROL: ISOLATING THE DECISION
On the previous compulsive ritual with lesson 45, the day that I wanted to look out the window hoping to see the neighbor in the nude I decided not to look. I stopped for a moment and decided this violates my value of lusting after women. If I would have looked out the window and would have seen her in the nude that would have been the point of no return. It was also a boundary of mine not to look out the window hoping to see the neighbor. I felt proud of myself and also by not looking I did not masturbate. This was another value I did not break which gave me a feeling of accomplishment.


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