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Castaway's recovery thread*
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Author:  CoachJon [ Fri May 01, 2009 1:08 pm ]
Post subject: 

re: "3. Anticipated lingering emotions: guilt, anger, frustration, sexual tension, fear that I may want to turn on the computer again, distrust of myself"

As a prompt, these are good. However, when you roleplay this ritual...make sure that you see these things as more than just words. Make sure you connect with how they will likely present themselves in terms of feelings, perceptions.

re: "overall"

This is much more practical and, as you will see, effective. Now, it is only the baseline...there is both expansion and evolution to still take place. But for now, PRACTICE situations that might trigger the need for such a values-based reaction. And if you feel real empowerment...force yourself through the learned helplessness that relates to your concern of 'what to do next'. Determine what you will do next. Make your 'best guess'. Through your experience, you already know what doesn't work...so exclude those things. Or, determine why they didn't work and adjust accordingly. Many times, it isn't the action...but the motivations behind the action that is at odds.

But all you are looking for here is your 'best guess' as to what will be most effective in managing this situation THE NEXT TIME you experience it. We aren't looking for a solution here, just a baseline to develop a solution. So forget specific plans or expectations you may have attempted/had in the past...focus on your current knowledge base, coupled with your maturing emotions. This alone will change what is or isn't effective.

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