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PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2018 8:57 pm 

Joined: Fri Feb 19, 2016 5:16 pm
Posts: 21
This is my second attempt.

The first one was last summer. Unfortunately though, I fell off the wagon and did not stay with the program. I'm back this time and hopefully with an entire year of new experiences, I will be able to successfully navigate myself through the entire thing.

Allow me to reintroduce myself.

PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2018 9:08 pm 

Joined: Fri Feb 19, 2016 5:16 pm
Posts: 21
Lesson 1 Exercises:
A. Three keys to establishing a successful foundation for permanent change in early recovery are:
1) actively committing yourself to change
2) not allowing guilt/shame to sabotage your commitment to change
3) allowing yourself time to change.
Consider where you feel you are in relation to each of these recovery keys? Briefly share your thoughts in your Recovery Thread.

1) I believe after an entire of trying during the school year. Now in the summer, it is a very good time where I can actively commit myself to change. Every single day of the year it is on my mind to change and recover but I don’t believe I have ever stayed consistent. I always go in so many directions and try so many things. I feel confident in staying with the program. Finishing a lesson every day or if it takes more than 1 day etc. I have been able to become more organized despite what I have said earlier and I will put each thing I learn and keep it with me.
2) I will not let guilt and/or shame to sabotage me in my commitment to change. Most of the guilt comes from being upset that my WILL was not strong enough. But again I understand the reason why I continue to fail is that I don’t know better and that WANTING is not enough.
3) I have always given myself time to change, perhaps at times at a fault. This will not be an issue though, if it takes 3 months, 6 months, or a year, I will be patient and kind to myself.

B. Beyond an active commitment to change, another important factor in determining your ultimate success is your motivation. Look deep inside and list ten to fifteen reasons why you seek to permanently change your life. Don't stop at three or four obvious ones, really examine your life and what is important to you. Phrase these in the positive. For example: " I don't want to keep deceiving my wife" would serve you better if written like "I want to be honest and transparent with my wife". Positive statements have much more power in our mindset than negative ones. List these in your recovery thread.

I want a real and genuine life and I am genuine in all that I do, no shame or guilt underneath
I want to have a great relationship with friends, family, and peers. Not hiding anything but being who I am
I want to live a life where I am in control always and I know I can count on ME
I want to live a lifestyle where I am fully able to enjoy myself and not constantly feel not whole and missing out
I want to live a life full of truth and not a life of lies and fakeness, in front of everyone
I want to be there for my younger siblings who are still in school and in development
I want to be able to fully engage and learn new things without feeling like “beating” this addiction first
I want to be able to fully achieve my academic heights and potential
I want to be able to help others and know that I am in position to do so, beaming a light to others

PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2018 1:26 am 
Recovery Mentor

Joined: Fri Sep 29, 2017 5:29 am
Posts: 198
Welcome back to RN WoFB,

The first one was last summer. Unfortunately though, I fell off the wagon and did not stay with the program. I'm back this time and hopefully with an entire year of new experiences, I will be able to successfully navigate myself through the entire thing.

Recognise that you got pulled away from RN last time and be ready for that this time if you do genuinely want to recover.

If you really do want to improve your life and to recover from your addiction then you are at a good place to make that wish reality
Commit, fully and completely
Work through the lessons and understand them , if you miss something ask on the help forum , assistance is always on hand
Coaches and mentors are likely to drop by occasionally but if not, don't worry as this is generally a good indicator that you are on the right path

The path is long and difficult but it is well proven and you are not alone
We usually suggest completing about 3 lessons a week but spending time every day posting and reading
Get to know your addiction and see yourself with honesty and openness

Remember to work at your own pace and it's not a race indeed some consider recovery to be a journey rather than a destination

I look forward to seeing your progress on your thread. Let's get it right this time.


"If you ever doubt the lie of excitement that anticipates an urge and wonder if it will be worth it, remember that there is a very good reason that you joined Recovery Nation"

PostPosted: Sat May 19, 2018 12:21 pm 

Joined: Fri Feb 19, 2016 5:16 pm
Posts: 21
Lesson 2: VISION

My vision for life is to have the following incorporated in my life and to represent who I am in words.
To have and maintain healthy relationships with other people and exude with others that feeling of a real and genuine life with no fear of being judged. Showcasing who I am and expressing myself to others with beaming levels of confidence in myself. Constantly moving forward to achieve excellence in the things in front of me that need to be completed (school, job etc). Always maintaining that level of responsibility and respect towards towards other people and commanding that right back (friends, co-workers, new people). Taking care of myself physically and mentally, having that mind and body awareness in everything I do (lifting, meditation). Socially to be someone of value and known as someone who works extremely hard and is disciplined (job, physical, confidence). To be an active member of my family who is an example and shines light on others in a manageable way (calm, relaxed, helpful). To always when given the chance, aiming to achieve the feeling of adventure in all of my experiences, having fun and pushing the limit of what comfort is (camping, road trips etc). Having great incredible friends who I can depend on and who can depend on me, socializing and developing bonds with them. Having clarity in what I want to achieve during the day, week, month, year (goal setting what is in front of me). Encapsulating all mentioned in my vision into a representation of my life.

PostPosted: Sun May 20, 2018 1:40 pm 

Joined: Fri Feb 19, 2016 5:16 pm
Posts: 21
Lesson 3: Values

Values that correspond to my VISION :

Living with integrity
Strengthening my role as a friend to close people around me
Strengthening my role as a coworker
Being dedicated
Being tenacious in my pursuit of school activities, class, extracurriculars
Being respected as a professional by others
Staying active
Being dependable
Sense of responsibility
Being considerate of others
Taking care of myself
Being a role model for my family
Being a role model for my peers
Living an exciting life
Living an adventurous life
Being challenged; overcoming challenges
Developing emotional maturity
Risk-taking (danger)
Striving for excellence
Physical health
Feeling sexually desired
Feeling masculine
Feeling empowered
Developing sustained friendships
Being validated by others
Being respected
Being judged trustworthy
Indulging in creative inspiration, development
Sharing my true self with the world around me
Developing superficial friendships
Being known as reliable
Connected to my own feelings
Being identified by others as charming and warm
Personal independence
Feeling needed, desired, loved by others
Experiencing uniqueness
Improving my social interactions
Being a leader
Sexual intimacy
Physical attraction/Beauty
Building things
Intellectual growth, debate,
Feeling happy and content
Pressure to accomplish
Accepting responsibility for living my life
Be known as truthful and honest
Sense of accomplishment
Feeling challenged
Personal growth, development
Living a charged life
Showcasing value to other people
High levels of confidence and charm
Hard work
Powerful presence
Awareness of actions/thoughts
Adventure and excitement
Organization of schedule
No bullshit/ just do it and do the next thing in day
Expression through actions
Poised and focused on task at hand
High levels of expectations in oneself
Helpful to others
Showing genuine interest in others and their life/day etc

Some of the values that went into the addiction were:

Alone/Time to oneself
No responsibility
No witnesses
Resting and sleep
Meaning/Purpose in day

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