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 Post subject: Recovery introduction
PostPosted: Tue Apr 30, 2019 9:28 am 
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Joined: Wed Apr 03, 2019 11:53 am
Posts: 13
Hello, everyone this is my first post on this forum, Right now I am in the healthy perception of addiction lesson(15) and I have a question:
My addiction is porn addiction
In the lesson it is said that sexual addictions are usually started by some form of trauma, and I was raised in a religious environment, it was not strict but it was still religious and when I saw a video on youtube for the first time that caused me to masturbate I felt horrible afterwards and like I have disobeyed god does this count as trauma?


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PostPosted: Thu May 02, 2019 6:13 am 
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Recovery Coach

Joined: Thu Apr 29, 2010 8:07 pm
Posts: 3793
Location: UK
Hello BM and welcome , even though you are not yet fully involving the community in you journey :pe:

posting does help
in any event keeping a written set of responses to what you take from each lesson is fundamental as you reflect on yourself and your journey
No one here will tell you what you have or need to do , that as with every aspect of recovery is your choice
yes you actually do have a choice
to act out, or not, to fantasize or not, to abstain or recover or fall deeper into addiction, you do get to choose

you posted
Quote:
In the lesson it is said that sexual addictions are usually started by some form of trauma, and I was raised in a religious environment, it was not strict but it was still religious and when I saw a video on youtube for the first time that caused me to masturbate I felt horrible afterwards and like I have disobeyed god does this count as trauma?



Masturbation is not unhealthy, unless of course it becomes habitual and takes control changing your values in life
could it be a trauma that brought you to where you are?
does that matter - for now!?


extracted from the lesson
Quote:
Some of the most common thoughts from people struggling with sexually and/or romantically compulsive behavior are associated with trying to understand why they are the way that they are. There must be some reason I am the way that I am. I need to know."

Well, for the most part, there is a reason that you are the way that you are. In fact, there are many reasons and they all fall within two categories: practical reasons and personal reasons.

The practical reasons involve the role that compulsive rituals play in your life.
The personal reasons involve an understanding of how past experiences/traumas have affected your evolving value system. As a general rule, understanding the practical reasons for your addiction is what is required for a transition to living a healthy life. Understanding the personal reasons is required for healing.


so for now dont worry too much concentrate upon that transitioning recall also THE COACH's comment
Quote:
"Have all sexual addicts been sexually traumatized? Or, "Have all love addicts been emotionally traumatized?"

The answer is no.


My own trigger was my (perceived) need for attention brought about by (perceived) lack of maternal attention, no trauma

as said welcome to RN and hoping to see you progress to where you choose to be, given that through dedication and commitment that you do deserve to get there

_________________
Remember recovery is more than abstinence
Every transition begins with an ending
Do not confuse happiness with seeking pleasure
stay healthy keep safe
Coach Kenzo


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PostPosted: Fri May 03, 2019 1:00 am 
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Joined: Wed Apr 03, 2019 11:53 am
Posts: 13
Alright, thanks for your reply. I might post what I did with exercises on the forum soon.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 03, 2019 4:56 am 
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Recovery Coach

Joined: Thu Apr 29, 2010 8:07 pm
Posts: 3793
Location: UK
Hi BM
hoping that you have and are continued (ing) in the programme
you wrote
Quote:
I might post what I did with exercises on the forum soon.

why not?
what do you have to lose?
this community does provide support, you can tap into that support, it does help
your journey your recovery hence your choice
:pe:

_________________
Remember recovery is more than abstinence
Every transition begins with an ending
Do not confuse happiness with seeking pleasure
stay healthy keep safe
Coach Kenzo


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