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 Post subject: Exercise 9
PostPosted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 3:42 pm 
Partner's Mentor

Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2014 1:34 pm
Posts: 668
I need some help on exercise 9. It is very early on in my husband's work on recovery. I understand he is working through the RN lessons and he has said he would like to get some additional help (therapy? 12 step?). Whatever that help is I don't know, but I do know it is his responsibility to find it.

Should I still do exercise 9 based on how early it is? Do it and come back to it over time?


 Post subject: Re: Exercise 9
PostPosted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 11:19 pm 
Partner's Coach

Joined: Mon Nov 15, 2010 11:49 pm
Posts: 675
Yes, you can still complete exercise 9, just be aware that it could change over time. At the minimum it will help you get the feel for assessing your partner's behavior in regards to his recovery. In some ways you should see the same things that a partner 6 months down the road would see, the difference being scale and skill. Very early on you're likely to see very small changes, and your partner is likely to be unskilled at it. For example, a partner might notice that their recovering partner is trying to manage their time better and has begun using a planner. Early on things may not get written in the planner, or things may over lap, or they may not plan enough time for specific events - in other words, they are still unskilled at it, but they are making a directed effort to change something about their life. Six months down the road, the partner will be more skilled and will have applied it to more areas of their life. With this example, your partner starting to use a planner could potentially be evidence of signs one, two, and four. They recognized a problem, it is a life skill that touches all areas of their life, and they formed a pro-active plan to improve. All that to say, some of these changes can (and should!) start very early in the recovery process. The more of them you see, the better.

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