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PostPosted: Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:44 pm 
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Partner's Coach

Joined: Fri Jul 06, 2012 6:19 pm
Posts: 452
Hi Tg -

It is suggested that couples do their own healing and recovery "before" starting the couples workshop. That would mean you doing the Partner's Lessons (which I see that you have started) and your H doing his own recovery in the recovery forum. I understand your need to hear success stories from other partners, but I would like you to turn your attention away from the outcome and place it onto yourself and your own healing first. If your H decides to pursue is own recovery, and after you both have done the workshop, then that would be the time to talk about success or failure. Each individual is unique and different and so is recovery and healing.

Quote:
I found out about my partner's sex addiction about a month ago, and kicked him out. We have been living apart since. However, we have now started the couples workshop and I'm wondering if I should let him come back home. He says he misses our son and me greatly.
Also, I'm wondering if I should have sex with him at all? I miss it. Or, should we just abstain until we get through our recovery?


I would refrain from making any decisions as far as living situations, at all right now, until you've progressed through the workshop. Abstence for your H, does not equal recovery - recovery equals recovery. So, turn attention away from your H and place in sqaurely onto yourself and your own growth and healing. For now, I know that it's difficult to trust your gut and listen to the voice within you, but answers to your questions will become clear in time - I promise. Keep moving forward -

Hugs -
Coach Sue

_________________
"You are the designer of your destiny. You are the author. You write the story. The pen is in your hand, and the outcome is whatever you choose." Lisa Nichols


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 2:30 pm 
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Partner's Coach

Joined: Fri Jul 06, 2012 6:19 pm
Posts: 452
No one can tell you what's right for you. These tough decisions must be made by you. What do you want to do?

This is why it is suggested that you both do your individual workshops first, before starting the couples workshop. While doing you own hearling workshop, answers like this will become easier to make because you will start to connect to your values and your decisions will be based off of what "you value" and not "what you feel".

If you would like more feedback on this topic, I would suggest posting a similar question in the "Community Support Forum - Partners". Here is the link:
viewforum.php?f=22

I hope this helps -

Hugs
Coach Sue

_________________
"You are the designer of your destiny. You are the author. You write the story. The pen is in your hand, and the outcome is whatever you choose." Lisa Nichols


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